Tobias Funke > Tobias Funke Quotes > Page 2
Tobias Funke Quotes (9 - 16 out of 17)
Michael: Maybe you'll be inspired by the boat party tonight and start a career as a pirate.
Tobias: I haven't packed for that.
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5.9 / 10.0
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Tobias: It is not a competition, Lindsay. We are doing this to save our marriage. But I should be telling you that I have been meeting more than my fair share of groupies. Or should I say "blue-pies"?
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7.7 / 10.0
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Tobias: Alright, let's discuss this bunking situation!
White Power Bill: You're gonna be sleepin' under me for a while.
George Sr: I sold you for a pack of cigarettes.
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8.4 / 10.0
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Tobias: Oh, a pregnancy test. There's something we never had, huh, Lindsay? No, we had to create our little Frankenstein monster out of science, and money, and just a dash of - would - how - how long have you been standing there?
Maeby: I just walked in.
Tobias: Just walked in! Seems like only yesterday you were bursting forth from your mother's fertile womb!
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8.8 / 10.0
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Tobias: I just need to prove to my wife that I can act like a man. And it's not about sex. I don't just lie there, if that's what you're thinking.
Michael: That's not what I was thinking.
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9.1 / 10.0
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Tobias: I like the way it shapes my junk.
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9.1 / 10.0
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Tobias: I must warn you, Michael, she doesn't respond well to strict directives.
Maeby: All right.
Tobias: That was odd.
Michael: Not really. Kids love boundaries. I mean, look at these girls.
Michael holds up GIRLS WITH LOW SELF-ESTEEM tape.
Michael: Is this what you want?
Tobias: Oh, God, no.
Michael: This could be where your daughter is headed.
Tobias: Oh, no, no, I don't want this for Maeby either.
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9.2 / 10.0
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Tobias: You know, Lindsay, as a therapist, I have advised a number of couples to explore an open relationship where the couple remains emotionally committed, but free to explore extra-marital encounters.
Lindsay: Well, did it work for those people?
Tobias: No, it never does. I mean, these people somehow delude themselves into thinking it might, but...but it might work for us.
Quote Rating:
9.2 / 10.0
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